Tag: Resilience

Even though setting goals in 2020 may sound like a bad joke, there are several steps a mid-career professional can take in order to gain traction and be successful.

Goals rely on two things; willpower and self-discipline. As Charles Duhigg wrote in The Power of Habit, “Willpower isn’t just a skill. It’s a muscle, like the muscles in your arms or legs, and it gets tired as it works harder, so there’s less power left over for other things.”

What if the willpower is not there?  For most people, it’s been a challenge to be as productive as they used to be and that takes willpower. How can we refocus to achieve our goals?  

First, BJ Fogg, Director, Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University and Author of Tiny Habits: The Small Changes that Change Everything recommends that we should not call them “goals” at all. Instead, he recommends calling them “aspirations” or “outcomes”.  He believes that having a big goal is great but the way to get there is by approaching it in small and consistent steps. Otherwise, we tend to give up. New Year's resolutions anyone?

BJ Fogg encourages people to ask, “what is the long term outcome I want to accomplish?” That way, you can develop a model and method to adopt an ongoing habit instead of a giant goal that won’t be accomplished. Too many people rely on the myth that repetition and frequency creates habits. He encourages people to apply simple habits first then add more habits as you accomplish them.  

BJ Fogg Tiny Habit Model Example: 

He explains his process and research findings:

• Get clear on the outcome you want and create “golden behaviors” for each one.  Place the main outcome/aspiration in the middle of a piece of paper and then create all the tiny behaviors as offshoots that will get you there. For example, if you want to write a book, commit to writing 200 words a day. It's an achievable goal and can be done in half an hour.  He calls this phase of identifying golden behaviors as “magic wanding”. It’s an opportunity to describe all the behaviors that are best suited for you. If that doesn’t work, change the behaviors.
• Look for ways to fit a tiny habit naturally into your daily routine. These action prompts are called “anchors”.  As an example, a routine such as brushing your teeth could be your activity prompt. After brushing your teeth, maybe you decide to do a two-minute plank. If you do this after you brush your teeth twice a day for months, you’ll have a stronger core and feel better.
• Tiny habits should be things you want to do so it will be more sustainable and lead to lasting change. The simpler the behavior, the easier it will be to grow your new habit. It’s like planting a small seed. And if it’s not working, ask yourself, “what’s hard about it?” Revise it to adjust to what feels natural and easy to do.

Importance of Celebrating

It’s important to celebrate tiny habits so go ahead and fist pump yourself or do a little dance.  People tend to discount celebrating, but it’s a critical part of the process. Fogg writes, “when people feel successful, even with small things, their overall level of motivation goes up dramatically, and with higher levels of motivations, people can do harder behaviors.”  Recognize your successes and feel good about what you’ve accomplished. This is one way to reinforce good behaviors and encourage new ones.  Envision yourself feeling awesome after your two-minute plank. There is a direct connection between how you feel when you do a behavior and the likelihood that you will repeat the behavior. It’s key to remember that emotions create habits. If you want to achieve serious outcomes and aspirations, start tiny and allow those small steps to grow over time.

Reviewed and Recommended:

All the methods and models he recommends are in his book,  Tiny Habits: The Small Changes that Change Everything 

If you’re interested in learning more about BJ Fogg’s human behavior research, listen to him on the Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish podcast.  Behavior scientist and author of Tiny Habits, BJ Fogg, discusses improving decision making, motivation trends, the role of emotion in sense of self and so much more.

#86 BJ Fogg: Create Lasting Change, Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish

Reviewed and Recommended: Christoph Niemann at 99u Conference: How to Overcome the 3 Fears Every Creative Faces

Christoph admits that when he did anything half decent in his life, he remembers being grumpy while doing it.  Self-deprecating in his approach, he reveals to the audience that he’s suffered from three main fears he has as a creative person.   His answers to solve these fears are brilliant.  

Top 3 Fears:

1. “I’m not good enough” 
2. “My work is irrelevant and soon I’ll be broke” 
3. “I’m all out of ideas”

Watch his talk here.

Are you comfortable with risk?  Most people aren’t but if you are mid-career and want to pursue something different, there is a huge upside in taking the leap or several.  Even if you stay in your current position and you’re curious about another topic, that’s a great start.  Trying something outside of your comfort zone allows you to adapt and learn and creating that excitement might be exactly what you need.

What’s considered risk-taking? Anything that makes you stretch and makes you squirm.  Public speaking? Taking an Improv class?  If you happen to be an extreme introvert, that’s OK. Think of all the things you’ve always wanted to try and see where it takes you.

New & Novel

Learning a new skill definitely counts as putting yourself out there and taking a risk.

If it isn’t related to your job, it gives your mind a refresh and can help to see things differently. It’s also incredibly beneficial if you’re tuned into the skills you already have and how you can expand on them. If you have an interest in consumer behavior, how about taking a course on transformation in the retail industry?

As David Epstein, author of a book called, “Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World” says, “Take your skills to a place that’s not doing the same sort of thing. Take your skills and apply them to a new problem or take your problem and try completely new skills.”  

My friend, Caroline, was a graphic designer working for a traditional media company.  She took several UI/UX courses and transitioned into a new job at age 55. Another friend, Ally, was so frustrated about finding a place for her mother to live that she decided to study innovation in senior living.  She envisioned and wrote about “mini compounds” where multigenerational families could be close but not in one house.  Her passion for the topic shone through and she was able to work with others who had a similar vision. At 57, she’s now working for a company headquartered in Europe that focuses on new (and less expensive) ways of living as people age.

If you find yourself wondering about things you’ve always wanted to try, take the time to study it and go for it.  Although uncomfortable at first, it will lead to areas that surprise you.

Security? 

Oftentimes people will say they need the safety and security of a full-time job or some other thing in their life they feel is too stable to disrupt and that is understandable. The reality is that your life could change in an instant.  Whether it’s a job lay off or something else. If there’s no such thing as security, it makes it easier to take that risk you’ve always wanted to try. It may help position you to be more agile and adapt.

Fear or Possibility?

Instead of focusing on what might go wrong when you take that risk (everyone succumbs to Debbie Downer syndrome), try to focus on what could happen if you DO try something new.  Hold onto that thought.  Envision what could happen if you open up the possibilities for yourself.

Goal setting and writing those goals down is great but without taking the actual risks, real change won’t happen.  And the more risks you take, the more you get used to it, the more you enjoy the rush of something new and want to do it again.  An added benefit is that you’ll also get used to failure that may show up.  When it does come up in life, maybe it won’t look so devastating. Why?  Because you have been through failure and persevered.

Chances are we’re all going through the emotional rollercoaster ride that is this pandemic. Whether you recently lost your job, or are fearful that layoffs are coming, we’d like to share some of the tools and resources that have helped us navigate these uncharted waters.

Surviving any crisis requires reflection and introspection. You need to know where you are mentally and emotionally before you can figure out how to get where you want to go.

We found the following diagram to be really helpful in recognizing where we are in our journey of dealing with the crisis. We’ll use this as the roadmap for understanding where we are mentally.

The Fear Zone

This is the natural starting point for any time of crisis. Most importantly, as long as they don’t prevent you from being productive, fear and anxiety are appropriate responses. When embraced, they prompt us to take action and to be diligent. When avoided, fear and anxiety can create a spiral effect and trap us. 

To escape the fear zone, engage socially and professionally. Participate in groups outside of your typical social and professional interactions. Tap into your personal interests and connections to help you be active and deliberate. One of the best ways to break free from fear is to help someone, whether they’re a family member, a friend, a neighbor, or a stranger in need. Making someone else’s day can make yours.

The good news is the best way out of this stage is by engaging in activities that are required for the next phase: learn about the facts.

The Learning Zone

Learning is a powerful platform for pulling ourselves out of fear and identifying new opportunities for growth. Start with learning how to recognize your feelings and emotions. Learn what triggers them, and what calms them down. Self-reflection and awareness are powerful tools. 

Many of us get caught up in the 24-hour news cycle, but if you force yourself to explore the facts from a diverse set of sources, and vet those facts with people you trust, you will be informed and in a far better place to evaluate your next steps.

The Growth Zone

The idea of entering a growth phase may feel foreign given your day-to-day reality, but those with a growth mindset are far more likely to find a positive path through uncertainty. Most importantly, growth doesn’t just come through introspection: helping others, and contributing your numerous talents to efforts that benefit others can present new challenges and opportunities. 

Whether it’s volunteering at your local food bank, mentoring a recent college graduate trying to navigate wholly new and turbulent waters, the simple act of helping others can teach you about new ways to apply your experience and skills, ways that can apply to your professional work equally as to volunteering and helping others.